1) I feel that my first sentence is attention grabbing as well as relevant to the topic.
2) My thesis is to the point.
3) I feel that my paper is well organized but i can develop my ideas a bit MORE.
4) Because it is my paper I'm not aware of any of my grammar mistakes. But I'm sure they are there!
5)I said what pages i found my information on.
6) I have well developed idea.
1.)I disagree with what was said for this part. i feel the main purpose of the introduction is just to state your thesis. Especially since you said my first sentence was "attention-getting".
ReplyDelete2.)Ill try to make my introduction more appealing. But my main concern for the draft was to get my thesis in the first paragraph.
3.)I agree that my ideas have to be more developed but i feel that dreams do play a big role in this although it isn't my topic. A dream is what we are working with. Therefore it is relevant because its exactly what we are diagnosing. Alice's WONDERLAND.
4.)I agree.
5.)I mainly paraphrased and I did give pages.
6.)I agree.